It doesn't matter how much or how little sleep I get nowadays.... I still wake up being lethargic, so, what the heck...? It's been a long long time since i last felt genuinely rested from a good night's sleep.... not that I have that many good nights to start with...
Technically, the sleep cycle is 90 minutes, that's what I have been told... but then again, seems like along with many other health-improving issues, it does not apply to me. Sigh...
Slept at 3am last night... was on skype with a close friend of mine... it's nice to have friends... nice to have people who don't mind hanging out with you, who don't jugde you, who welcome you with open arms regardless of who you are, what you are....
Then again, alongside warmth and appreciation lie fear and many questions. Perhaps, it's just me that I dared not trust... that I have this urge to protect myself from people, lest I get hurt again by those that I loved.... As the saying goes, once bitten, twice shy....
Yes, I know that I am a coward... but it's still far too dangerous to venture out.... It hurt too much the last time.... feels like the possibility of getting hurt far outweighs a chance of making new friends. Sometimes, it's just too scary....
I'm tired, yet I can't sleep....
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