been going up and down more often than usual rcently... the highs are happy days are bright and shinny but the darker ones are gloomy and depressing... and to make things worse... this fluctuation is getting more erratic, more and more unpredictable as time goes by...
the past two weeks were spent in rock bottom and guess what? was considered by the so called cisis proffesionals as attention seeking... does it mean that i would have to be found downing a month's supply of my medication, considering i am taking an average of 5 pills a day, to be taken seriously, to be not seen as making things up? i so hate the labels and pigeon-holling of mental disorders!
perhaps i should be a mental health advocate sometime in the future....
been pondering a lot about what's gonna happen to me in six months' time recently... pondering a little too much i would actually say...
which path should i take? what choice should I make?
it's all so muddled up.. it's all so confusing!!
yet then again, that's life...
in about another week's time, it'll be two months since Val left... her friends are coming together to raise funds for the Malaysian Mental Health Association (MMHA) though this year's blogathon blogging in the blog "Walk On By"....
while it's a really great gesture on their part and on all those who will be donating, it's really a shame that such a tragedy had to happen to jumpstart a donation drive for MMHA...
I missed Val...
I guess, even though it's been almost two months, I am still seeking closure...
perhaps I really should be writing a letter to her...
I really don't understand...
yet at the same time, I could almost feel her pain...
the demons within us... as Edrei always calls our inner turmoil...
